time_master

Whoop whoop

2009-02-10T19:19:06Z

I found out I was accepted into the San Francisco leg of this year's Cut and Paste Competition.
In short, I'll be competing against eight other graphic designers to create something with a provided theme in fifteen minutes. Everything I do will be projected on a huge screen for everyone to see, and there'll be beer.
If anyone wants to come out, you'll see me shivering in my metaphorical boots, and it should be a good time.
Also, if I win SF I get to go to NY and compete for the global championship against winners from the other 16 cities across the world.

time_master @ 2009-01-01T02:12:00

2009-01-01T10:14:00Z

happy new year!!

time_master @ 2006-11-14T19:43:00

2006-11-15T02:43:08Z

Am I saying this right?:
bowler shat us?

Probably not but that's beside the point. On top of landing landing an actual graphic design job at the university (can I say benefits? own office? squirrels outside my door? hot married 40 year old women?) where I already told them I'd be leaving in a year and they don't care, they made me buy a camera. Now the end of this week will be the recipient of a package full of $1600+ of photography equipment. Now I get to add photographer to my graphic artist title.

time_master @ 2006-04-23T12:57:00

2006-04-23T20:03:48Z

sometime next week, hopefully sooner than later, my book can be bought at the UCD Bookstore for $5 apiece. It's actually surprisingly easy to get a book you've made on the shelves there, just a phone call and a face to face meeting is all it took. Of course it didn't hurt that the man who decides these types of things was partying at my house last quarter and did keg-stands on my roof, and I called him out on that fact, but I'm sure it didn't help all that much. But long story short, I'd urge you to buy one if you have the funds, and if not I'll probably just give you one if I see you on campus and you ask.

time_master @ 2006-04-02T18:46:00

2006-04-03T01:56:09Z

It's sad it took me thirty-one days to come to the conclusion that
Although I did get a surprisingly large number of people (five) ask me where my mustache went when I shaved it off, I guess that counts for something.
My goal was to look as similar as possible to my student ID picture, so I suppose I'll have to show the results here.
=/=

I'm not going to show any higher resolution pictures because, frankly, its embarassing. I'm beginning to think I should just give this whole thing up forever.

time_master @ 2006-03-24T09:53:00

2006-03-24T17:55:33Z

where the another part of my life went last quarter:
www.samsellers.com
some of the html links are a bit buggy, but I'm getting that all sorted out.
and be sure to click on the shapes below the little guys.
who would've thought that domain name would still be availible?

time_master @ 2006-03-20T21:16:00

2006-03-21T05:34:51Z

It's my children's book I made starring this little guy:

named Thomas. It's thirty-three pages and probably took me over a hundred hours to make, although I wasn't really keeping track. If you'd actually like to read it, each page of writing corrisponds to the next illustration. Because of the way I bound it I had to print it out this way, although you might hurt your eyes trying to read the type on images this small. The actual book is 10"x10".

In the alternate ending I had Thomas kill himself, but I thought that might hurt my chances of getting it published so instead he walks by a dandilion.

live action simpsons?

2006-03-04T06:18:28Z

I'm not sure I know what to think.

time_master @ 2006-02-28T23:04:00

2006-03-01T07:09:31Z

holy crap I can barely believe it's

anybody wanting to join must follow these simple rules:

1.don't shave your mustache
2.reap the benefits of your new found sexual attraction from all genders

there's still a facebook group for you UCDavis students left around from last year.
follow this link to get there, and then join, damnit.

time_master @ 2006-02-20T12:49:00

2006-02-20T20:55:22Z

It was my little brother's eighteenth birthday yesterday. To celebrate, we had a choice between the Indian casino or the strip club or buying cigarettes and smoking them in the park. We chose the casino.

I lost seventy dollars and Peter lost fifty which is why we took this picture holding up Gold Country Casino matchbooks instead of Gold Country Casino winnings.

And here's a small group shot, featuring the only winner of the night, Gordon, with a total of $6.15. And some weird guy on the right who snuck into the picture right before I took it.

time_master @ 2006-02-15T18:09:00

2006-02-16T02:10:44Z

I got censored today.
Some people at the Aggie thought my comic was a bit too raunchy for their newspaper. So I figure I may as well show it here.

And I may as well show this (not especially work safe) one too as I can now see there's no chance in hell of me getting it published, despite me thinking it's pretty funny.

time_master @ 2006-02-14T19:58:00

2006-02-15T04:05:22Z

My second favorite comic in the Sacramento Bee. Too bad it only runs on Sundays.

I can't believe someone actually gets paid to make these.
Morrie Turner you genius bastard, you.

time_master @ 2006-02-03T09:09:00

2006-02-03T17:27:15Z

This makes so little sense I love it. I think this and Wee Pals have become my two favorite comics in the Sac Bee.

5 jobs I've had in my life:

caterer
barista (or is it 'baristo' if you're a dude?)
librarian
graphic designer
cartoonist

5 movies I can watch over and over:

High Plains Drifter
Wet Hot American Summer
Can't Hardly Wait
Shaolin Soccer
Best in Show

5 Places I've lived:

Chico, CA
Davis, CA
.
.
.

5 TV Shows I like to watch:

The Simpsons
Arrested Development
Angel
Daily Show
Iron Chef

5 Places I've been on vactation:

Iowa (woot!)
Japan
Seattle
Guatemala
Maui

5 of my favorite dishes:

Corned beef and cabbage
Turkey sandwich made the day after Thanksgiving
Teriaki Burger from McDonalds in Japan
tacos from a taco truck
bbq ribs

5 websites I visit daily:

gmail
hotmail
somethingawful forums
facebook
lj

5 places I'd rather be now

in a hot tub
in bed
in some pants
on my bike
in a book

and I tag everybody, just so you know.

If anyone reading this is going to be in Davis tomorrow night, I'd highly recommend attending RobotMedia as Taylor and myself will be making our debuts in starring roles in a short that I promise won't disappoint.
scout's honor.

time_master @ 2006-02-02T18:03:00

2006-02-03T02:05:03Z

There's a National Yogurt Association?!

dim sum!? not you too!

2006-01-11T03:20:27Z

I have a feeling this quarter will force me into permenant hermit-hood when I'm not busy on campus, so I've been trying to cram as much socializing as I can into what little free time I have left before it's all taken over by homework and projects. And I'd rather not hear anything from you biology or chemistry or psychological biology majors saying that I have it easy, because I already know. I enjoy the work I do, and even though there's a shitload of it, which is only getting bigger the more outside projects I take on, I consider myself lucky that I somehow fell onto a path which should keep me content for a long time. And that's not to say that I'm dreading these next ten weeks, okay actually I am, but it'll be nice to see what I'm capable of.
Now I'll have to wait and see if I'm not just talking out my ass and end up getting drunk by myself every night this quarter watching 90s high school coming-of-age movies.

time_master @ 2006-01-02T13:21:00

2006-01-02T21:24:42Z

Happy Birthday Kristen

I'm sorry it's so gruesome,
my intention wasn't to make your
cat look impaled on a birthday cake,
just to make it look like he's
down to party.

time_master @ 2006-01-01T17:01:00

2006-01-02T01:02:03Z

the second saddest moment of my new year weekend.

I really wanted a hotdog too.

I woke up on a floor wearing my roomate's clothes with a loaf of banana nut bread in my satchel

2005-12-18T20:02:30Z

these are the christmas cards I made and had every intention of sending to each one of you until I realized making color photocopies is expensive, as are stamps. I was planning on writing a personalized greeting to everyone, unless of course I don't like you in which case you wouldn't get a card at all; but alas, I like eating food every once in an odd while and plan on doing so for the rest of the break. Merry Holidays!

time_master @ 2005-12-16T18:53:00

2005-12-17T02:59:00Z

I have the best secret santa ever. I don't know who it is, but if s/he reads this I want him/her to know I'm thrilled.

theyre still around, and someone stuck a stick in one.

time_master @ 2005-12-11T22:17:00

2005-12-12T06:18:04Z

Genna and Kristen are the two most thoughtful and physically attractive friends ever.
thank you thank you thank you.

time_master @ 2005-11-30T20:25:00

2005-12-01T04:29:47Z

Is it really not that obvious that I'm going poop on the comic below me? How many of you thought the punchline had to do with actual poop and not a shitty comic which happens to be below mine? Should I have made the turd saying something like "I'm pooping on Alex Olenick's email address?"

Oh, and I don't think my lj icon has ever been more appropriate than right now.

ch-ch-ch-chico

2005-11-27T23:28:12Z

Amongst other things I did while spending my time in chico was see the new harry potter movie to pass the time while locked out of my house; it just happened to be starting ten minutes after I showed up at the theater. And what did I think of it? People should be allowed to punch other people's kids in their faces if warranted. That's what I thought of the movie. If the theater weren't so full of even more snot-nosed wieners I would've changed seats away from the fat kid who wouldn't shut up about who was going to die and who was going to slay which dragon and who would win in a fight between a pokemon and Harry Potter, and the kid who wouldn't stop punching at the screen, stretching his arms onto my face, checking his indiglo watch, tapping his foot and touching his goddamn crotch.
If my kid were annoying someone in a movie theater and if I was too busy hiding my hard-on for the fourteen year old British witch on the movie screen to notice my kid being a dick, I'd thank the guy who slaps some silence into him/her.
I ate lots of cranberry sauce too.

time_master @ 2005-11-13T11:18:00

2005-11-13T19:20:31Z

There are four Band-uh freshmen and one big non freshman glasses wearing guy cleaning (mopping, sweeping, vacuuming, scrubbing) my house after their party here last night.
And they brought me McDonald's breakfast.

time_master @ 2005-11-12T17:11:00

2005-11-13T01:15:49Z

I swear, these things just keep getting better and better.
I'm surprised that whoever owns the wall across the street hasn't taken them down. They must be lovers of the fine arts as well.

Last night was fun. I felt weird buying only a single set of tupperware from IKEA; it came to $2.41, I think. I probably made out with at least five dollars worth of booty if you count the twine and plastic bags, though.

Oh the wonders of the internet.

2005-11-09T17:58:59Z

Has anyone heard of this webpage? I'm just upset I didn't think of it.
I need to buy a shirt, stat.